Sometimes I feel like going through all the trending news stories that appear on my Facebook news feed, and posting them, just so I can attach a (at least in my opinion) funny, witty, clever, or ironic tag line. I don't do this because it would dilute the things I really think are important or interesting, and everyone would block or unfriend me.
But just to give you an example:
World Sleep Day (I missed last year's because I slept through it)
Police Discover Meth Lab in Walmart Men's Room (well, it is one-stop shopping)
Doctors Complete World's First Penis Transplant (and after all the money I've spent on enlargement gadgets)
Bored Pilot Draws Penis on FlightRadar with Private Plane (I guess that's better than pilot draws penis on FlightRadar with private parts)
Awkward 'Final Jeopardy' with One Contestant Is Painful to Watch (yes, and the one contestant got the answer wrong - and lost money!)
Edits to Wikipedia Pages Traced to 1 Police Plaza (online encyclopedia accuses NYPD of brutality against police brutality)
Maria Layton, 43, Finds Deadly Brazilian Wandering Spider Nest on Bananas (okay, at first glance this headline isn't funny, but wait. Here is a quote from the article, "The fruit was infested with eggs of the Brazilian Wandering Spider, the world’s most venomous spider, which can kill a human in under an hour. The bite of the Brazilian Wandering Spider can also give a man a painful four-hour erection – its venom is currently being studied for use in erectile dysfunction treatments." FYI: The Brazilian Wandering Spider is also called the "Viagra Spider." Bananas, erections, Viagra - no tag line needed)
"And that's the way it is."
Walter Cronkite, CBS News
Walter Cronkite, CBS News
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